It's coming, it's coming!

I will say no more.

Meow and Whatever Sound Bats Make

Have you seen the new bats and cats collection at Forever21?  If not you need to look ASAP.

http://www.forever21.com/Product/Category.aspx?br=f21&category=Promo-Bats-and-cats-collection

Me-owns (see what I did there? see?) an embarrassing amount of the pieces but wish I could pull off the fur bat jacket.  I need the bat pajamas I feel in order to make a sound statement at the dorm...as Rachel Zoe so brilliantly put it, "I die."
 

The Fall Season in Shows: A Quick Rundown

New shows worth checking out:

Trophy Wife

Mom

Blacklist-I actually haven't watched it but my family is obsessed.

Sadly it was a weak start to new shows this year.

New shows to skip:

Reign-It could have been more fun but it takes itself too seriously and the leads lack charisma.

Most of the new comedies, including: Sean Saves the World, The Millers, The Crazy Ones, Back in the Game

Ironside-So much potential wasted

I don't want to put Super Fun Night on here because it has a cute premise but it needs to sharpen up

Shows that need to get back on track:

New Girl

Scandal-Let's get it together people!  The reason we watch is to see Olivia and Fitz together, come on.

The Real Housewives of Miami-Usually a fun escape, it seemed more shrill and annoying this year.

Parks and Recreation-This isn't the show's fault really, but I fear that it may be going the way of cancellation and that's a shame because it really is a cute, quirky gem.

Pretty Little Liars-I am only putting PLL on this list because the Halloween show was such a disappointment; don't waste our time with a transition into the Ravenswood spin-off, not cool.

Shows that are back with a bang:

The Good Wife-Wowza.  Backstabbing, betrayal, could the split at Lockhart/Gardner be any more intense?

The Mentalist-We best be finding out who Red John is, finally.

Revenge-The show listened to viewers and got back to what it does best, Emily crossing off people one red X at a time.  Just don't let her get too soft on us; Jack and Nolan aren't helping any.  "Oh Ems all I ever wanted was your friendship," I love you Nolan but shut it, I want to see the kick-ass Emily action!

Glee

The Mindy Project-I almost counted it out last year but this year it is more ridiculous and funnier than ever with no lack of banter between Danny and Mindy.

The Vampire Diaries-They might want to temper down the doppelganger thing though, I mean I'm totally for multiple Paul Wesleys walking around but it's getting a bit much.

2 Broke Girls

And the funniest lines so far go to:

The Mindy Project: Danny to Mindy

"You're mad because you think the Brown Lady M&M stole your look!"

2 Broke Girls: Caroline

"I cannot be a latent bisexual, I already have enough on my plate!"

The Vampire Diaries: Damon to Jeremy

"Put the crossbow down Pocahontas."

No Cats Allowed

My sister sent me this link in explanation of why we should never get a cat...

http://theoatmeal.com/misc/frame/cat_kill

And it's true, who would want to see this face mad?

 

And Other Such Things

 

Just a bunch of ramblings of things I had wanted to write about that were worth mentioning I think...

The Killing ended with such a bang I thought about it the whole week afterward.  Did not see that coming.  This was me the entire time (I think I got on my mom and sister's nerves)..."Oh. My. God. No. No. No.  What? No. No. How will Sarah be okay after this? Oh. My. God." It looks like we will never know though because the show is cancelled again :(

As to Pretty Little Liars can I just say...I knew it! Ezra you were slightly creepy! But does this mean he's not the real culprit? And why does someone have that much time and money to torture 4 teenage girls?

Come on Vampire Diaries. Last season was a little lacking. You better make up for it with more shots of Damon this season.

The Fault in Our Stars can be described by one word-"Wow." It's a fast-read and incredibly poignant. It speaks truths that I believe everyone can relate to. Augustus Waters is my new favorite literary hero. I am hoping the movie can live up to the book but Shailene Woodley is turning out to be a very good actress who makes acting look natural.



This is not new but everyone must see A Separation. It is one of the best movies of all time I think. I could go on and on about how it shows human universality and what ties and tears us apart but I it would suffice to just say see it.

Short Term 12 is excellent. It is a small indie about a halfway house for kids with troubled pasts. Worth seeing and remembering that sometimes smaller films still get it better than anything else.



Before Midnight, the ending of the trilogy Before Sunrise and Before Sunset, is a beautiful end. The fight scene, which everyone has talked about, is like watching real life. I think the names fit the stages of life. Before Sunrise is about the naivete and hopes we have when we are in our 20s and the world still seems bright and new. Before Sunset is when we have lived a little and have had more experience in our 30s as we decide where to go with major turning-points in our lives. Before Midnight is about our 40s and beyond as we are trying to find more stability and want to be able to reflect kindly on our past.

I am looking forward to fall movies, like Gravity, and shows like Betrayal (oh the melodrama yay).

I am off now but will be back soon!  I will just leave with The Silver Linings Playbook quote that has been stuck in my head lately thinking about my family and my good friends, "The world will break your heart ten ways to Sunday. That's guaranteed. I can't begin to explain that. Or the craziness inside myself and everyone else. But guess what? Sunday's my favorite day again. I think of what everyone did for me, and I feel like a very lucky guy."

Pilgrim and me on my scooter (sigh not a cool Vespa sadly) wish he could come with me might have to sneak him into my luggage...

Girls Girls Girls

I am a little late to the party but I finished Girls seasons one and two on my iPhone like a madwoman a couple of months ago.  I had heard a lot about the show, about how it is controversial and some critics love or hate it.

I found myself caring for and about the characters.  Sure they are whiny, even neurotic and desperate, at times.  I guess all of us are at some point.  That loneliness and searching comes along with my generation.  It is a package deal as we seem to be even more lost than just usual young people.

I think the beauty that lies in the silences in Girls is extremely powerful.  This point is perhaps most illustrated in one of my favorite episodes (albeit one that seems out of place in tone), "One Man's Trash."  The most affecting and agonizing scene is when Hannah opens up to only to find that we are almost disposable to one another.  She admits that really she just wants to be happy even though everyone pretends they want more.  Two lonely people find each other and still one ends up hurting the other.

There are scenes in Girls that are cringe-worthy but the fact that Lena Dunham is willing to go there is both extremely courageous and smart.

Birthday Time

I feel like T. Swift lied to me; 22 was not "magical."  Here's to hoping 23 is...

I got new hair! :)

I'm back!

Hi readers, I've missed you.  I'm sorry for being away for so long.  I was dealing with summer classes both online and in person-although I'm convinced that online ones are more work than in person.  In person one can fudge the reading and can listen to lectures.  Basically we read the complete textbooks in 6 weeks.  I had one teacher who liked to use CAPITAL letters in her emails telling us to read the syllabus.  In my film class (which was in person and which I enjoyed) there was one student who couldn't understand why we would want to watch films from any other perspective but the American perspective.  I was about to say, "What do you think is the point of film?  We get to travel to places we will never see and meet people would probably never get to meet otherwise.  The point is for us to open our eyes."  I was just opening my mouth when another girl, albeit a little know-it-ally, said a little more bluntly, "What are you talking about?"  They proceeded to fight about Kubrick's position on war (anti-war obviously but not so obvious to our friend here who believed Kubrick loved war and that was the reason he focused on it so much).  It reminded me of when I had tutored this spring.  I was going over Shakespeare's Julius Caesar with one of my tutees.  I was giving some background on Shakespeare and how he explores human themes like love, loss, and betrayal.  My tutee then says, "Man, he had a lot of problems."

So, after surviving 3 summer classes, a home makeover (and unsuccessful garage sales-one man asked if I had any old firearms or Navajo rugs.  I hope you are not allowed to sell old firearms?), and lots and lots of swimming (oh do I have a story for you there...) I am now preparing to go back to Stanford in the fall-2 weeks away.  I will have a mobility scooter (not the cool Vespa kind, more like the elderly kind with a basket in the front).  My mom said, "You will be popular with your scooter," and I said, "I don't think that's how the whole popularity thing works.  Not that I would know."

Initially I was scared shitless (excuse my bad language here but sometimes it seems like other words don't fit) but now I guess I feel more nervous but kind of feel like, "Let's finish this up already." 

What We're Left With

Rust and Bone is a gut-wrenching, aching collection of poignant scenes.  Two lost souls from different worlds, Stephanie and Ali, meet in a club.  Stephanie (played brilliantly by Marion Cotillard), a whale trainer, has a horrific accident during a Seaworld-like whale show, in which she loses both her legs.  The scene in which Stephanie wakes up and finds that she is missing her legs is rattling and devastating and made me cry out.  Ali is a lower-class single father who used to be a kickboxer.  He seems fed up with life and doesn't care about anything or anyone very much. 

Marion Cotillard has become one of the strongest actresses of right now.  She handles this role with care and just with her eyes we can see Stephanie journey from being haunted to being hopeful.

Stephanie and Ali develop an unlikely bond driven by Ali's lack of notice of her disability and her pull towards his physicality and roughness.  This bond is also driven by Stephanie's desire to reach out and hold on to someone, anyone, that will make her feel like she didn't fully disappear.  They come to rely on each other as partners.  It takes one more tragic event, though, for Ali to finally understand what's important and to admit his love for Stephanie. 

Stephanie's transformation from the dark depths of despair to an unrelenting strength is both painful and astounding to watch.  Although my situation is nowhere near to Stephanie's, I felt like I was crying for her and for me.  We are finding a new way to walk and we are defined by our wounds and scars.  These characters are all damaged in their own way.  Through our breaks we become whole though, for to be human is to be (slightly) broken.

The Love Song of Jay Gatsby

I saw The Great Gatsby in an early premiere.  I had mixed feelings before I saw it as I had been extremely excited to see the movie when I learned Gatsby would be played by Leonardo DiCaprio but I grew worried when Carey Mulligan (although an excellent actress) was cast instead of Scarlett Johansson as Daisy, Tobey Maguire was to be the eternal observer/our eyes for that era as Nick Carraway, and especially because Baz Luhrmann was to direct the film.  Luhrmann is unpredictable and I am not the biggest fan of Moulin Rouge!.  I did enjoy his version of Romeo + Juliet, punk and angsty, is interesting with two great leads, Leo DiCaprio and Claire Danes.

Needless to say I went in with expectations lowered.  Luckily, I liked The Great Gatsby more than I thought I would and more than the critics' reviews allowed us to believe people would.  Originally the film was supposed to come out in December before the Oscars and got pushed back to May. 

Luhrmann's The Great Gatsby takes too long to get started.  It also seems to take too much pleasure in the excessiveness it purports to show for the purpose of paying homage to F. Scott Fitzgerald's analysis of the time.  It's a world where the takers take all and those who wish to be a part of that world never truly are.

I didn't particularly care for Luhrmann's cartoony, garish direction.  For Gatsby, it's easier to picture a darker vision.  The middle and the end of the film is gripping, though.

Gatsby and Daisy show us what truly tragic, destructive love looks like

Most of the actors do seem to be miscast, but they try their best.  Mulligan's Daisy isn't totally wrong, but Daisy is supposed to be more aware, shallow and selfish rather than skittish and overly sensitive or vulnerable.  Maguire is not right as Nick.  An actor with more depth is needed; perhaps like Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Tom Hardy, or (go along with me here) Gabriel Mann.  DiCaprio steers the film and is simply excellent.  He is also beautiful to withhold as he brings that era to life and seems to have been born in the wrong time.  His clothing fits him effortlessly and his golden, sleek hair shines in the sun.  Joel Edgerton, who plays Tom Buchanan (Daisy's brutish husband), comes the closest to matching DiCaprio's strength.

The soundtrack was built up more than the movie itself.  The theme song, Young and Beautiful by Lana Del Rey, to Daisy and Gatsby's love affair is both haunting and epic.

Funnily enough I came across this poem that I had written in high school during an academic program to Oxford, England.  I had read The Great Gatsby in then and I remember writing about what it meant to me.  I remember feeling for Gatsby and seeing that utter humanness in him; he just wants to belong.

Ode to Mr. Gatsby 

Brilliant but blind

Gatsby, who are you trying to be?

Lost in the place you know, lonely,

            in the middle of a deafening crowd.

Daisy, deceptive as the flower, seemingly

simple and sweet.

You loved her.

An obsession willing

            to sacrifice your life, hurting

            others.

Getting hurt yourself.

Acts of ultimate betrayal.

Gatsby, you are pretending

The privileged who lives untouched,

            fall separate and numb to the world.

They welcomed your amateur acting game.

Trying so hard to be seen in an invisible world,

I see you now,

You disappear.

Oblivion is Sci-Fi at its Best

                       

Oblivion is a surprise in the midst of the many misses that are spring movies.  It is sci-fi with some heart, what is so often missing in the genre (please don't make me mention Prometheus again).  The heart comes mainly from Oblivion's lead, Tom Cruise.

Cruise is so vastly underrated as an actor.  Like Brad Pitt he can drive blockbusters as well as smaller films.  Arguable Cruise is an even better actor than Pitt, able to show great range of emotion and more depth.

Oblivion is set in the future after an alien race has defeated much of the human race.  Earth is largely uninhabitable and Jack Harper (Cruise) and partner, Victoria, are under the impression that everyone has relocated to different moons.  Jack soon learns that they have not been told the full truth.

The cinematography of Oblivion, especially the scenes of Jack and Victoria's living quarters high up in the sky with a pool almost suspended in air, is beautiful.  Something that truly stands out about the film, though, is the musical score.  Grand and lovely, it stays with you long after the movie's final credits roll.

Pain & Gain: More Pain than Gain

Pain & Gain is an unpleasant film to watch, start to finish.  I am not a big fan of Michael Bay's work, particularly because of all the problems Pain & Gain illustrates.  Bay tends to focus more on style than story or substance.

The way the movie is filmed is interesting, very Miami with bright, nauseating colors and glitz.  I could not believe it was based on a true story and I can see how it was hard to choose the tone of the film.  Pain & Gain can be classified as a black comedy.  Three fitness junkies come up with a plan to make quick money by kidnapping and torturing a mogul.  They are inept at everything and the film goes on from there.  There is no one to root for as all the characters are unlikable and unsympathetic.

Mark Wahlberg and Dwayne Johnson (aka The Rock) try to provide some comedic effect.  Where the film fails is taking too much joy in the violence it shows, making the movie seem like it is on the substance Johnson's character, Paul Doyle, becomes addicted to.  This makes the movie seem like a bundle of absurdity and leaves us with the questions, why and what was the point?

Mud: A Subtle Portrait of Firsts

When I first saw the preview for the film Mud on TV I was surprised because there had been little promotion for it.  Mud looked interesting, though, and had good actors in it, including Matthew McConaughey and Reese Witherspoon.  It looked like one of those films that serves as a portrait of the south, and from some reason I am particularly drawn to those.

Mud did not disappoint.  It is a bildungsroman, or coming-of-age tale, of a couple of best friends.  Ellis and "Neckbone" learn about love, loss, and how people are complicated and live in an eternal grey area-where it's difficult to tell exactly what's wrong and what's right.

The setting is as complex as the people in the movie.  Set in the deep south, Mississippi, there is a clash between city and life on the river.

Matthew McConaughey is great as the title character, a man with a good heart who is misguided and usually on the losing side in life.  He is also a bit self-destructive as he keeps saving and sticking with Juniper, a childhood love (Witherspoon).  I'm not sure what happened to make McConaughey snap out of the 8ish years of soulless rom-com hell he was stuck in, where he wasted any of the talent he had, but whatever it is he should keep it up.  This is the McConaughey we had hoped for, the one in Amistad and A Time to Kill.  This is the actor who can play flawed characters that are ultimately good and who can also play men who are anything but good and live on the outskirts of life.  In The Lincoln Lawyer I started to wonder if he could only give impressive performances when he plays lawyers.  Then came Killer Joe and Magic Mike.  He also has Dallas Buyers Club coming out later this year that already has him talks for being an Oscar contender.

The two young boys, Tye Sheridan and Jacob Lofland, are excellent in the film.  Their performances are so natural, and like the film, stoic and subtle.  Mud is a hidden gem indeed.

See You in Istanbul

I have just published my first book, See You in Istanbul, in both e-Book and print format!  It is available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble.  See You in Istanbul is a collection of funny stories about travel, food, and family.  It is about the misadventures we often go through as we go exploring outside our realm.  I was influenced by the great, hilarious David Sedaris and Laurie Notaro, two of my favorite writers.

Please check it out readers!  I hope you enjoy it.

Amazon Link:
http://www.amazon.com/See-You-Istanbul-Peri-Unver/


Barnes & Noble Link:
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/see-you-in-istanbul-peri-unver/


Some pictures of the yummy food described in See You in Istanbul (good thing you guys can't see me drool...

In Istanbul, the de-salting of fish, a sort of extravagant process

Sea bass

A type of burek (fried pastry filled with ground beef) that my Aunt makes

Sigh...manti. It is a delicious dish with ground beef in little dough hat-like shapes boiled to perfection.  Add garlic yogurt and a spicy butter sauce and voila- it's nom nom nom time.

My dad, who is like a master chef, makes scrumptious Turkish dishes often.  This one is a favorite, kofte (beef patties) with "Shepherd's Salad," tomato-butter rice, tursu (Turkish pickles), and purslane and garlic yogurt.  We keep trying to tell him he should open a restaurant.

A giant kumru sandwich-made of toasty sesame bread with sucuk (spicy beef sausage), tomato, and cheese melted to greatness.

Don't bring any guilt around here! Lokma is like a donut, fried dough with a sweet syrup and cinnamon on top.

Quotes

I am an aficionado of quotes.  Whether it be funny ones, like when Modern Family's Cam says of Lily's biting problem: "It's like Twilight back here!" or on The Good Wife when Alicia Florrick says to her husband's female political opponent "People wonder whether men and women can be friends.  The question is, can women?"

I like quotes from books, movies, and television shows but I also like quotes or lines from songs too.  Recently I've been listening to Grace Potter's "Stars" and loving the lyrics.  I dare you to listen to this song and not feel nostalgic.  Every time I listen to it I can see certain images.  My favorite lines are:

"I lit a fire with the love you left behind
And it burned wild and crept up the mountain side...

I can't look at the stars
They make me wonder where you are...

And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far"

Actually, I don't think Taylor Swift gets enough credit for her ability with words.  Off of her latest album, from her song "All Too Well," there's a particular phrase that I have fallen in love with.

"You call me up again just to break me like a promise.
So casually cruel in the name of being honest
I'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here..."

A favorite poem of mine that is beautifully haunting is The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T.S. Eliot.

"And would it have been worth it, after all,
Would it have been worth while,
After the sunsets and the dooryards and the sprinkled streets,
After the novels, after the teacups, after the skirts that trail along the floor—
And this, and so much more?—

We have lingered in the chambers of the sea

By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown

Till human voices wake us, and we drown."

My chest hurts and feels hollow after I read this poem no matter how many times.  As Dumbledore says to Harry, "Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic, capable of both inflicting injury and remedying it."

Spring and All Its Secret/Hidden Memories

Springtime is bittersweet.  Whereas Autumn is filled with the fluttering of beginnings, spring usually means the end of something.  In my case this spring would have been the time I graduated from Stanford.  One of my tutees (who is in elementary school) recently asked me if I cried once I went on leave because of my knee.  Cried for what I asked?  He wondered if I cried because I missed school and my friends.

I told him I hadn't but that's a supreme lie.  Sure I cried.  Hell I still cry sometimes and let the tears fall on Pilgrim's fur, crimping it in the area that becomes wet.  Mostly I cry for what I remember and what I feel like I'm missing.  Lost time and lost experiences, lost years I guess are what I cry for.

I can see the path that would have led me to graduation this year, a senior.  I guess I would have already had to decide whether or not I wanted to pursue a Master's or PhD degree.  Would I want to teach or would I have been as set on writing?

Then I think that I would've almost been stuck in time without ever really growing or evolving.  I would have been set in my ways, in a box.  Stuck with the same old friends and close-mindedness.  I wouldn't change or trade the person I am today for the naive one I was.

I hadn't written for a while.  Tomorrow I am seeing my surgeon to find out if the cartilage transplant was semi-successful.  I am back on the two crutches and feel like throwing them into the fire.  I want to be able to walk Pilgrim finally and to return to college in the fall. 

The summer is an open book.  What lies ahead I don't know but I feel some excitement in the air. 

Star-Crossed Loves

I have found a new doomed romance.  That's my weakness.  Doomed romances, ships passing in the night.

Scandal has the pair that I am obsessed with.  Kerry Washington and Tony Goldwyn portray Olivia Pope and the President of the United States, otherwise known as Fitz, respectively.  They are a duo that never quite find peace.  When one of them is ready to go all-in the other isn't.  One is always begging for the other to trust them, to give in to them while the other is angry.  Still, they can't give one another up.

These romances I find so intriguing.  I am enamored with them and with the whole idea of loving someone that much in general.  I blame my mother for reading Pride and Prejudice with my sister and me when we were younger.  We used to cuddle up under the blankets on rainy days and watch the BBC version of P&P and Ang Lee's/Emma Thompson's angsty Sense and Sensibility.  My dad would see the television and roll his eyes.

Flash forward to today and nothing has changed.  In fact, we still watch those same films with the same enthusiasm.  I would like to review two movies that have come out recently on DVD that are of that genre.


Anna Karenina:

Anna Karenina, famously said to be the most well-written novel ever, is creatively brought to film in a way much unlike the adaptions starring Vivien Leigh and most memorably, Greta Garbo.  This writer/film lover/movie reviewer also admittedly has a bit of a thing for tragic heroines (ie. Tess from Tess of the d'Urbervilles) and not just doomed lovers.  

Keira Knightley captures not only Anna's beauty, but also her strength and her passion in a time and place that repressed such feelings in women.  Anna Karenina is a dutiful wife and mother who discovers that both lust and love do exist in the world although they seem foreign and forbidden for women especially.  

Jude Law plays against type as Anna’s stern, older husband.  Law lends too much sympathy to the character, though.  We must feel for Anna more than for her husband although we may disagree with her actions.  After all, this is the man who forbids her to see her own son after her affair with Captain Vronsky.  Aaron Taylor-Johnson (an up-and-comer) stands out as the striking Vronsky.   

What leads to the film being so polarizing is the way in which it is directed.  Filmed by Joe Wright, who shot Atonement and Pride and Prejudice, the movie is like a play.  It is filmed on a stage with moving set pieces and much imagination (Anna’s letter to her estranged husband crumples into snowflakes) but becomes predictable and tiresome.  It also seems like it gets in the way of the story rather than aiding its message and fluidity.  Whether this direction was the right decision for the film is an important question.  Did Wright mean to say we are all just players in life or as inconsequential as moving set pieces?  Or does he mean to show that country life is the only thing that is real not the falsities of city society?  The scenes set in the country are not on the stage while the scenes in the city are.  What we are meant to take from it is unclear and whether this choice in direction was necessary is unclear as well.

A Royal Affair:

I had been excited to see A Royal Affair for a while.  It had gotten good reviews and it looked right up my alley, a costume drama with a tragic romance.

Luckily I wasn't disappointed.  A Royal Affair is a beautiful film that is hard to forget after the final scene.

The film is set in Denmark in the 1700s before the Enlightenment.  We are being told the story by a young English woman, Caroline, who is married off to the Danish king, an immature, mentally ill man.  He doesn't know how to take care of himself yet alone run a country.  This is where Struensee, a doctor, comes in.  He has high hopes to get close to the king and change the country for the better.

Struensee, with the help of the queen, is able to do this but at what cost?  The ending is a disturbing image of how one's good intentions often don't mean very much in the end.

Alicia Vikander, who plays the queen, is excellent.  She is a talented actress (also in Anna Karenina) and definitely one to watch.  She has a knack for making all of her characters relatable and sympathetic.  Mads Mikkelsen (who I am obsessed with currently) is phenomenal.  His eyes are haunting and he is reminiscent of Charles Darnay.

Even though this film is based on true events in history and you know it cannot end well, you still fervently root for Caroline and Struensee to make it.  A Royal Affair is romantic and heart-wrenching, powerful and poignant at the same time.   

Movies, Movies, Movies

I know I had promised movie reviews for the Academy Award Best Picture nominees (I have seen all the nominees but one it turns out-still waiting for Amour to come out on Netflix and looking forward to how much of an upper that one will be).  As an avid movie lover/watcher I also have quite a few more reviews to add to those from recent films I have seen in the movie theater and at home through Netflix.  (Not to go off on a tangent but does anyone else miss going into actual video stores and picking out what to watch?  I do.  Now I’m in charge of our queue at home and get blamed if the movie is bad, cough cough Prometheus but I’ll get to that later.)

 

As I was getting iced at the end of physical therapy I saw something interesting in Health magazine (the only kind of magazine they have there besides Reader’s Digest unfortunately).  There was a site that had four-word movie reviews.  I took it as a challenge to see if I too could write four-word movie reviews that were still meaningful.  Here it goes.

Best Picture nominees:

Zero Dark Thirty and Silver Linings Playbook- (see older posts for reviews).

Beasts of the Southern Wild- Whimsical, almost better afterwards

Les Miserables- Could have been better

Lincoln- Smart and vastly underrated

Life of Pi- Great effects but soulless

Argo- Extremely close to perfect

Django Unchained- Powerful in every sense

Amour- (Review to come after Netflix)

Netflix DVDs:

Animated:

Brave- Spunky heroine, cute bears

Indies:

Moonrise Kingdom- Childlike but also childish

The Sessions- Poignant, subtle love observations

Safety Not Guaranteed- Indie without direction/endgame

Robot & Frank- Funny and surprisingly heartfelt

The Master- Unlikable to a fault

Foreign Language Films:

The Intouchables- Eye-opening, new Odd Couple

Elena- What was the point?

Footnote- No-one to root for

Lemon Tree- Heart-wrenching look at loss

(Other foreign film recommendations: Caramel, A Separation, and Paradise Now, all excellent.)

Blockbusters:

Flight- Don’t waste your time (P.S. Seth MacFarlane’s hilarious Flight sock puppet sketch for the Oscar opening is quite accurate even though it is also somewhat offensive.  The part with the socks in the washing machine is genius.)

Prometheus- What was that? Ewww (My family will never let me live this choice down.  It was tres horrible and I got mean looks at the end for the two hours that we will never get back.  Squids freak me out more than usual too now.)

Current movies out in theaters in the time, as I like to call it, when movies go to die (post-Oscar/pre-summer period):

Side Effects- Solidly good, watchable thriller

Beautiful Creatures- A much lesser Twilight (Speaking of which The Host got horrible reviews so I didn’t even attempt to see it, and I see a lot of movies.)

Admission- So intensely, incredibly disappointing

Olympus Has Fallen- Circa Air Force One

Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor- Hack-job writing, preachy hilarity (I dragged my sister to this one and she said some of the funniest things when we came out.  I believe her best quotes were, “So basically the gist of the movie was ‘Woman thou shalt not cheateth lest you be alone and miserable for the rest of your life!’”  Another great one was, “When Kim Kardashian is the best thing in the movie you know you have a problem.”  Lastly, “Jurnee Smollet-Bell deserves an academy award for acting in this film.”  I have to add that I thought it was so awful that nothing happens to the men in the movie and Judith, the main character, was deciding between dull and duller.  Their banality alone should have led to some consequences instead of only the women suffering.  All in all, my sister wasn’t too happy I made her see it with me but I thought it was hilarious nonetheless-though not as funny as Beyonce in Obsessed.  Need I say, “Did you not get my message?”)

Not much to look forward to on the movie front.  That's why I'm always sad when the awards season ends.  I’m waiting to get Rust and Bone on Netflix and A Royal Affair which should be good.  The films that are out right now that I thought would have gotten better reviews didn’t.  The Place Beyond the Pines (with Ryan Gosling), Trance (a Danny Boyle film), and The Company You Keep (a Robert Redford film) all received middling reviews.  Coming to theaters soon are the Tom Cruise futuristic/sci-fi film, Oblivion, and The Great Gatsby (which got pushed back to spring instead of this past winter).  I am afraid of Baz Luhrmann’s interpretation even though I’m sure Leonardo DiCaprio will make a fantastic Gatsby but I guess we’ll see.  Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock are teaming up in The Heat this summer and I’m excited for that.